What does a French teacher correct first in a draft?
Read the first draft, try the edits yourself and compare your version with the revised French email.
A grammatically correct email can still leave its reader wondering what to do. In this exercise, the writer needs a new meeting time. Before looking for agreement errors, check whether the person receiving the message has enough information to reply.
The draft and comments were written for this exercise. The cover is an AI-generated illustration.
The writing task
You have an appointment at a language school on Tuesday at 4 p.m. You cannot attend. Write an email explaining why, suggesting two times and asking the school to confirm one. Use a polite register.
First draft
Bonjour, je vous écris pour mon rendez-vous. Je ne peux pas venir parce que mes horaires a changé. Je suis disponible mercredi ou jeudi. Est-ce que c’est possible ? Merci.
Read it once as the staff member receiving it. Underline the words that tell you which appointment to move, then mark the proposed time slots. What would you need to ask before you could update the calendar?
Three rounds of feedback
| Pass | Comment on the draft | Possible edit |
|---|---|---|
| Task | Mon rendez-vous gives no date or time. Mercredi ou jeudi gives days, but no times. | Identify the Tuesday appointment and offer two specific alternatives. |
| Clarity | Est-ce que c’est possible ? leaves it to the reader to work out what needs confirming. | Ask which of the two proposed times is available. |
| Language | The subject of a changé is mes horaires, which is plural. | Write mes horaires ont changé. You can also write mon horaire a changé if you mean one schedule. |
The first two passes change what the recipient can do with the message. The grammar correction can then be made in a sentence that already has a clear purpose. At this point you might also add a subject line so staff can spot the request in their inbox.
Revised email
Objet — Report de mon rendez-vous de mardi à 16 h
Bonjour,
Je vous écris au sujet de mon rendez-vous de mardi à 16 h. Mes horaires de travail ont changé, et je ne pourrai pas venir.
Je suis disponible mercredi à 17 h ou jeudi à 10 h. Pourriez-vous me confirmer si l’un de ces deux créneaux est libre ?
Merci de votre aide.
Cordialement,
Alex
Reporter un rendez-vous means to reschedule it for later. Annuler means to cancel it. Here the two suggested times make the intention clear even to a reader who is scanning the message quickly.
For your own practice, change the situation. Imagine that Thursday is your only free day and the school offers a time you cannot make. Write a two-sentence reply with a clear reason and a new proposal. Read it from the recipient’s side before checking your verbs.
If you also want to practise using feedback out loud, try answering one speaking question twice.
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